Saturday, July 21, 2012

Confessions of a Cell Phone Addict

Hi!  My name is Ed.  And I am addicted to my phone!  It all started out innocently enough about 8 years ago.  Just a simple clam shell type dumb phone to use for emergencies.  And I was happy with it for several years.  An occasional phone call and a rare text message.

But one day that wasn't enough.  For some reason, that escapes me now, I had to be able to more easily do text messages.  And the standard 12 button phone was just too unwieldy for me.  I had to have a keyboard with all of the letters on it.  And so I upgraded my phone to a hot little model that popped open to a fully equipped keyboard.  And now I could more easily send text messages; at least a dozen a month, to go along with the two phone calls a month. Aw, life was good!

Alas, my love affair with my phone eventually lost its passion and my eyes began to wander.  And it seemed like every other commercial during that football season was touting the upcoming and sexy new Motorola Droid.  At first I was able to resist the siren call of the Droid.  Of what possible use could I have with a smart phone?

But before long I realized the vacuum in my life, not being able to send and receive emails wherever I happened to be.  And it slowly dawned on me how important it was to be able to look up the time for the next ferry to Seattle from the car.

And so disinterest slowly turned into raging lust.  I just had to have a Droid.  I restrained myself as long as I could, but just a few short weeks after its release I found myself in my local Verizon store with a shiny new Droid clutched in my hot sweaty hand.  And after what seemed like endless counseling, I was turned loose with my new love.

It was hard to believe how I had ever really lived, not having instant access to email and the web.  Aw, life was good again.  As time went on I became more and more dependent on my phone.  When a note worthy scene is found, out comes the phone for a picture.  When lounging in my hammock up in the mountains, out comes the phone to read a book or watch a movie.  When I am lost, either in the woods or in town, out comes the phone with its built-in GPS and maps to tell me right where I am, as well as how to get to where I want to go (at least when in town).  It was hard to believe I had survived in this world before Droid came along.

I'm sure by now you know where this is going.  After two years of bliss, Verizon told me I was eligible for an upgrade and dangled a Droid Bionic in front of me.  It has a bigger screen.  It does 4G.  It's faster, sleeker and sexier.  And it doesn't have the now unused physical keyboard.  And so Droid is supplanted in my affections by Bionic.

Bionic is outfitted with a belt holster, blue tooth ear thingy, and extended batteries.  Emailing, texting, surfing, videos, music, Facebook, and on and on.  New mapping software for the backcountry is added to allow me to wander at will without getting lost.  A subscription to Amazon Prime allows me to watch free shows and movies.  Kindle software allows me to read all my books.  The phone plan is extended so I can spend hours talking on the phone for my job.  The home land line is cut.  I am one hot and well equipped geek.

Today I took the latest step and upgraded my phone plan, yet again, to allow my phone to become a mobile hot spot.  Now I can connect my laptop to the internet over my phone.  I can sit at the beach and still be fully connected to the rest of the world.  How cool is that?

Yes, I am addicted.  But I am loving it; at least for the next year or so.  Just don't try and get between me and Bionic.  It might get kind of messy.

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